rosie abigail

Are you new to the allergy life? Trying your best to understand a loved one’s allergy? Or just want to know more about the minefield that is eating out with an allergy? Don’t you worry; I’m here with some advice and tips that have helped me along the way. 

Before we begin, let me give you a bit of information about myself and my allergy experience. I have had an allergy for as long as I can remember. It wasn’t discovered at birth but I had allergy tests as a young child after a few concerning moments around chocolates and at family parties. The allergy in question is a severe allergy to peanuts and a moderate reaction to nuts in general.

With my peanut allergy, I pose a risk of going into anaphylactic shock which can include hives, breathing difficulties, fainting, and even death (I know, sounds fun). With nuts in general, I develop a more typical reaction; itching, coughing, swelling, and sickness (I mean, this doesn’t sound fun either). But because nuts and peanuts are so prone to cross-contamination, I treat both allergies as serious as they can be. I’ve lived with these allergies for over twenty-years and I have been determined not to let it stop me enjoying my life. And a big part of my life? Food, friends, and experiences. 

If there is one thing I want you to take away from this post, it is this – eating out and making those memories over food is absolutely doable for people with allergies. Doable and enjoyable. You just need a lot of patience, preparation, and lessons under your belt. So, to help you with that last part, let me tell you the top tips I’ve gathered whilst living with a life-threatening allergy.

Chain restaurants are your friend (well, most of the time)

Some of my favourite restaurants that cater for my allergy include Wagamamas and Pizza Express. Wagamamas have a manager go through the menu and take your order for you, as well as cooking the food in a separate area. And Pizza Express (at this moment in time) doesn’t use nuts or peanuts at all! It just has a handful of ‘may contain’ options, which can be easily avoided. 

It is great to have an arsenal of names in your pocket so when a friend says to you “shall we grab dinner?”, you know of some places that are more reliable. But, you should never assume that big chains are going to be good for all allergies. For example, Five Guys, one of the world’s favourite burger chains, are so behind on the times; they use peanut oil to fry their fries meaning the whole menu is completely inaccessible! In fact – 

Never assume a place will be allergen friendly

Even if you have eaten at a restaurant before or ordered for years, never just assume it will be safe. Always check the menu, use the allergen menu, and speak to the staff. If there was one small change, one replacement ingredient, less care in the kitchen because they didn’t know about your allergy? Then that is totally on you.

Take control where you can

Getting diagnosed with an allergy can feel like your life is suddenly in your hands, and that you are the only one who can protect it. Put it this way, I know how daunting the concept of trusting servers and chefs can be. But if you take the initiative and put in some work beforehand, you can take most of the risk away. A lot of living with an allergy is mitigation.

For me, taking control involves looking at menus online in advance. If there are peanuts on the menu in any capacity (I’m looking at you, satay), it’s pretty much a no-go zone. Risk, mitigated. Getting in depth with the allergen menus is also a great idea. Not only can it allow you to glimpse into the menu in further detail, but you can actually see what you can have. There’s no point going to a restaurant if they can only offer you one item that you don’t really want.

I’d also recommend every traveller’s best friend – TripAdvisor. If I am looking to eat at a new restaurant and need some convincing, typing in “TripAdvisor [restaurant name] allergy” into Google can pull up a treasure trove of reviews. The great thing is that the allergen community knows the importance of sharing a good experience – or a bad one.

Get comfortable talking to people

Lean into the vibes and trust your gut – if they sound like they don’t know what they are doing, they probably don’t. The same goes for when you arrive – talk to the staff immediately, let them know about your allergy. Nowadays, most restaurants worth their salt will have allergen menus, anti-cross-contamination zones, and will get in there with a question before you can.

Be prepared for the ‘we cannot guarantee’ chat

I need to put a pound in a jar each time I hear “we don’t use nuts in the kitchen, this is a totally nut free place, but we cannot guarantee anything is nut free”. I’d have a good size holiday fund by now, to be fair. Most restaurants will tell you about their “no guarantee” disclaimer to legally cover themselves, just in case. This doesn’t mean that they don’t take allergens seriously – it just means they are protecting themselves. 

When they utter that phrase, it is entirely up to you how you engage. For me, if a Thai or Indian restaurant said it, I would have to leave. Nuts and peanuts are a staple in those cuisines and are used across so many factors of food that the chance of cross-contamination is too high for me to feel comfortable. But for cuisines where nuts are not a staple, such as Italian, I would be much more comfortable. It all depends on your allergy, its severity, and your personal comfort levels. In other words, it’s all about your discretion. 

Never let anyone belittle you

I’m sure allergy folks will already be snapping their fingers and shouting “YES, I hate this!” – some people will just not care about allergies. It’s so frustratingly common. They won’t try to learn, they won’t listen, they just won’t care. These are the people who will say “it’s not that bad”, “you won’t die”, “don’t spoil the fun”, “I’m sure you’ll be fine”. Uh-huh. It’s at that point that I like to tell them about how anaphylaxis works and how quickly it could take for me to die, complete with pictures. 

Now, I know that might seem drastic to some folks. But living with an allergy is such a vital part of my life, I will not have it diminished to an over-reaction (excuse the pun) – and neither should you. Nothing is more important than your health and comfort, so if the environment you are in starts to feel pressured or negative, walk away. There is so much power in walking away and protecting yourself. 

Always bring your medication

I’m talking all levels of allergies here, from antihistamines to EpiPens. Nothing grinds an allergy-havers gears like a fellow allergy friend saying “no way! I have that allergy too! I just don’t bring my medication with me”. Queue reasons such as “I don’t like carrying tablets”, “I’ll just call 999”, “I always forget”, and my personal favourite – “EpiPens are just too bulky, you know?” What?! The life-saving adrenaline needle is too bulky?

Your medication is there to stop a reaction and to potentially save your life. You should always carry it with you. Whether that’s at a new restaurant, one you’ve visited fifty-times, seeing a mate at their house, at the park, at the cinema – the list could go on. For example, I went out to get coffee with my friends – a pretty nut free activity. I touched a table that hadn’t been deeply cleaned and ended up having to go to hospital (despite using my medication, I might add – the medication did what it was supposed to and slowed the attack). The safest you will be when eating out is when your medication is by your side. 

And if you are reading this post to learn more about allergies, make sure you always know where your friend’s medication is, as you may be the one having to administer it…

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Eating out and exploring the world with an allergy is doable – in fact, it is much more than doable! The clincher is, you just have to prepare more than a normal person, and prepare for your experience to be slightly different. If you are newly diagnosed, it will take time and effort to fall into a routine that works for you. But remember this – putting yourself first is the key. You deserve to have the most joyous, exciting, food filled life without fearing for your health. It’s a journey, one that you have to lead yourself, but a journey that any restaurant that’s worth going to will help you on. 

Let me know if you have any questions about my experience of eating out and about with an allergy, from when I was child to all the way up to managing my allergy on nights out! I’ve got a few favourite chains I’d be happy to share, as well as specific restaurant red flags. Allergy friends from all over, what restaurant is the best for you? I’m also off to Barcelona in a few weeks, so I’m sure a eating out with an allergy abroad post will be on it’s way soon…

Thanks for reading,
Rosie x

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